![]() this involves constant nit-picking, criticism, being compared unfavourably to other siblings (or other children), unreasonable judgments, etc.). The child is also likely to experience competitive marginalisation (i.e. Later, in his 30’s he did marry, but it was someone his mother approved of, a nice soft woman she could also control. He then, in his bid to please her and win her love, he had two tattoos with her name placed on his body. He ended the relationship with the girlfriend to please his mother and win back her love. He could no longer take the rejection of his narcissistic mother who completely cut him off. She refused to speak one word to him if he was with that young woman, and after a year the son returned home and complied with his mother’s wishes. His narcissistic mother instantly felt rejected by her son, so she totally rejected and abandoned him in return. Of course, the time will come when the adult child will push for independence, and this will be a stormy time for both child and narcissistic parent (regardless of whether it is a father or mother).įor example, I know a boy when in his 20’s insisted on leaving his family home and moving in with his girlfriend. These tactics erode the child’s confidence and keep them more pliable for narcissistic control. This becomes especially useful in older age when the pathological narcissistic parent finds themselves lonely and abandoned by most of their acquaintances. The hidden message is telling the child that they would not be able to manage out in the world on their own, so don’t even think about doing that, you are so useless you will get lost in the big world (Infantilisation). emotional, physical, financial, and sexual, etc.) this helps to keep the child in servitude to them throughout their lives. ![]() They try to create a dependency in their children (i.e. The children are there to serve them as co-narcissistic supply, and they will become extremely jealous at any signs of the child’s growing maturity and independence.Īny independence in the child will be perceived as a threat, so it must be stamped out before it takes hold. The child is always in this parent’s shadow, with unreasonable expectations required of them, expectations that are designed to fulfill the narcissist’s selfish needs. Their children are little more than objects or possessions to them, to be used and controlled indiscriminately. Rather than the child living through the parent, the parent lives through their child. When it comes to their children, because the narcissist lacks empathy, they make a terrible parent (both the male and the female parent). ![]() (The Below Is An Excerpt From “When Shame Begets Shame”)
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